#this is a pretty old song from Ukraine I think

[heedzhee-art]

more of my yapping about the fandom-given hetalia Ukraine name

I don't like the Katyusha Ukraine because in my opinion it doesn't suit her, and people constantly use the name incorrectly. basically, Katyusha is like a playful version of "Kateryna/Katya", but people write it like a formal first name pretty often (Katyusha Chernenko), no blame since it comes from a place of unfamiliarity with slavic languages, it's just a bit annoying. plus the word is associated with that one russian song that became popular during World War II god it just doesn't suit her at all in my opinion 😭

"Katyusha" is a diminutive form of the name Kateryna, except it's of russian origin; in Ukrainian the diminutive forms of the name are "Katrusya", "Katerynka", or less commonly "Katrunya"

historically, the russian empire and later the soviet union promoted russian at the expense of Ukrainian, leading to the suppression of Ukrainian culture and language. of course, some Ukrainians use Katyush/Katyusha as playful nicknames, because the blending of Ukrainian and russian, that's been caused by reoccurring russification, migration, and political influence, lead to mixed usage in everyday speech – it's a normal thing (surzhyk). it's not a crime to use this word or anything, I just find it ironic that the character that represents a nation constantly oppressed by russian imperialism, in hetalia only exists as a dependant and less important character to give russia more endearing relationships and make him more interesting, and then the Japanese fandom coincidentally has also chosen the russian word for her name (I assume it's after that popular soviet song)

really I feel there's not much Ukrainian about canon hetalia Ukraine, which seems to be a very common feeling among many of my Ukrainian friends who know about the character :/ they think she's cute and pretty, but when it comes to national identity and culture, she is not relatable even on a stereotypical level, and has little depth as a character

anyway, if you want some Ukrainian first names, here's a list of the ones I think sound fitting (SUBJECTIVE OPINION 😡)

🇺🇦🔱🌻🍲🇺🇦🌾🌻🍞🇺🇦🍲🌾

Myroslava (love this one) - slavic origin, a combination of мир and слава, meaning peace and glory. it suits resilient and strong people

Olha/Olya (ОЛЯ UA!!!!!!!) - scandinavian origin (ukr. variant of Hélga). yea it's a really old and really common name that associates with the Kyivan Rus era, anyway I use it because of a meme and due to every Olya I've met building this collective Olya in my head that's literally how I also see Ukraine. she's such an Olya. it's hard to explain

Olena (not Olyena) - greek origin (ukr. variant of Helénē) came to Ukrainian through Church Slavic "Yelena" (not Yelyena)

Lesya - Ukrainian name deriving from "Olesya" which in turn derives from "Oleksandra". I'm very biased about it because it's one of my favourite female names, and also many Ukrainians associate it with Lesya Ukrayinka, which is the self-given title of an outstanding Ukrainian writer, translator and cultural figure

Halyna - likely greek origin and comes from "galēnē". I like it because I get to call her Halynka/Halya, I think it sounds cute

Tetyana - common slavic name, likely of roman origin, it just has a tender and pretty sound to it

these names are common in some or all other slavic languages, differing in varied phonetics

😑 I am NOT gatekeeping people from calling her "Kateryna", I just personally dislike Katyusha or russian Yekatyerina for her, and in my opinion the old russian-speaking fandom did a better job naming her Olha, even if that popularized the russian transcription for this same name (Olga)

my Ukraine is named Olha Tkachenko. I just like it the most and I've kind of grown used to it. whateva

I will kiss you.

[unhonestlymirror]

Historically, Ukraine as Kyivan Rus' once tried to colonise Baltics, which led to a couple of wars with Yotvingians, but Baltics were always pretty separate and independent, so Ruthenian Dukes eventually decided to give up on them and focus on colonising Polatsk (Belarus) and Finnish lands instead. Polatsk was the first to become independent from Kyiv thanks to Usiasłaŭ the Sorcerer... but Hungary kicked the Teutons out after they tried to make a coup d'etat -> this coincided very strangely with the invitation of Teutons from Mazovian Duke: "Please come liberate us from evil Prussians" (although Baltics were pretty okay with Christians until the very Teutonic campaign) -> Prussia and Skalvija were wiped out by Teutons -> Latvian Baltics were occupied by Crusaders, too -> Polatsk had to unite with Lithuania (and A LOT of Baltic refugees) and accepted the name "Litva", etc. etc.

Ukrainians don't have bad feelings about medieval Lithuania because in Kyivan Rus' times, it were, in fact, us who tried to colonise them... but 1)we didn't succeed, reasons unknown, but my guess is that they were just way too tall, way too organised and WAY TOO GOOD AT CLIMBING TREES to us, steppe hobbits, 2)it kinda nullifies because Lithuanians colonised us back (because of Teutons), I guess?

Lithuanians, however, still call themselves "colonisers of Ruthenian Duchy😭", lmao, they're so sweet. Double funny because some Ukrainian historians are PRETTY salty not about our colonisation by Lithuanians but rather about the fact they gave up on us because of a single war lost to Horde! and sold us to Poland. (There was, in fact, Game of Thrones with Hungary involved but that's another funny story.)

Lithuanians always were very nice people. Ruthenians didn't believe this at first, because of the Western European propaganda of "evil Baltic pagans!!! who eat children and bow to Satan and don't want to surrender to Our Lord Jesus Christ!!!" - thus, people with the bitter experience of the Horde's slavery immediately left Kyiv after it was conquered by Lithuanians - but they didn't cause massive destruction and were overall pretty civilised with anyone, including Christians ("We don't bring the new, and we don't ruin the old"), which was very shocking. After all, in Kyivan Rus', people heard about the genocide that Crusaders brought to the north, too, we never had any illusions about a whole ass foreign army with PTSD.

Ukrainians have offensive songs about every single country that tried to occupy us - EXCEPT for Lithuania. I think this is very indicative. Belarusians don't even hide their fanaticism towards Grand Duchy of Lithuania and "good old days".

I really dislike textbooks who say "Polish-Lithuanian period" - because there were two periods! Lithuanian and Polish! And they were pretty different from each other!

[tocja]

Okay, I try to avoid this whole Eurovision thing since Israel is not banned, but something caught my eye.

I came across Polish entries, and first on the list was a song by some young woman in cheap babushka/stereotypical Slavic girl cosplay. And it made me irrationally mad. So mad, actually, that I started talking to myself about why the idea of a young blonde in red lipstick and a plastic flower crown makes my blood boil.

And I came to the conclusion that I hate the idea of 'vague Slavicness.'

There is this ideal that being Slavic means the same thing across borders, and as much as I can appreciate cosmopolitan sentiment in this statement, I have to also notice that this is exactly the type of narration which is used by Russia to deny us identity.

'There is no Ukraine - they are just half-baked Russians';

'They are not Poles - they are Russians in denial';

'We are all the same in our Slavic brotherhood and we will be stronger as one' - and I've met my share of Slavic nationalists to know that for some people, those sound like promises and not threats.

If we are all the same, then it is not an attack - it is unification.

And Slavicness means a lot of things; it is not the same even within the borders of the same country. Seeing this idea of being vaguely Slavic, enough to be recognized as one, but not to the point of giving yourself any actual cultural identity - it seems extremely pandering, as if we are trying to show some sanitized version that could be easily sold to everyone. Everyone recognizes 'babushka,' and who cares if you don't even use that word in Polish - your Slavicness makes you semi-Russian by proxy.

And not to be misunderstood - I don't think that the mentioned singer did that on purpose; I am pretty sure she just wanted to make some cute folkish tune that could represent her country.

I just think that the aesthetic of being Slavic is so ingrained in us that we actually forget that this is a culture, not a box of Pinterest/propaganda prompts.

I am rambling; it doesn't have to mean anything. Maybe because I come from a part of Poland with a strong regional identity and work in a museum, I am uncomfortable with the idea of a 'universal Slav,' and this video just serves as an excuse to rant about things that were already bothering me."

Ok fking wait a second

I was just finishing, when i decided to check the video again. The description states:

Kwiaty" is not just a song; it's a heartfelt journey into Slavic, old-fashioned love. Dama's lyrics take us back to a time when gestures spoke louder than words—buying flowers, sweet words, and walks under the moon. The song contrasts this nostalgic ideal with the modern lack of effort in relationships. Dama sings of a Slavic girl's strength, bravery, and confidence, longing for genuine connections. "Kwiaty" becomes a bridge between cultures, inviting reflection on the essence of sincere, old-fashioned love.

what the fuck is slavic old fashioned love

I was saying that I don't think the singer meant anything bad, and well - yes she did, here you go, you get romanticized slavic traditionalist propaganda about GOOD OLD TIMES XDDD

The lyrics are crazy

So you want me but you won't open me door

So you want me but you won't walk me home

So you want me but won't pay on our date

So being with you and without you it's the same

As it is shown by the text above, I am not native english speaker, I make my share of mistakes, but I am pretty sure that some wonky english is on display here.

I have Slavic blood

I keep my head high

And my tears dry

So don't waste my time

Oh yeah babe, there it is, Slavic blooded girlboss.

OKOKOK i don't want to show more text as it is physically painful, but I couldn't find a better definition of ''vague slavicness'' even if I tried. Some '' Slavic dama'' singing about ''Slavic love'' What makes it slavic? plastic flower crown, white frilly dress and patriarchal views. Culture? Those things I mentioned are not culture?

I believe that slavicness can be genuine, historically informed, modern and progressive please please please don't let us fall into conservative superficial ideals, just because it sometimes feels like there is not much more to us and our culture. We are rich and diverse.

It took a turn lol

[chaberkowepole]

I was in Warszawa stare miasto (Old Town) yesterday

And maybe it's all those stories, songs and poems that I have been infused with since childhood but damn. I never expected to be hit like that. By a city I have never seen.

Its beauty took my breath away. I hadn't expected it to be so pretty. And at the same time, every step was accompanied by immense grief.

They say pre-war Warsaw was as pretty as Vienna. If you've ever been to Vienna, you know what I'm talking about.

I was constantly wondering, which building is new and which one has survived the bombing. I have never felt the density of sheer history in the air as much as on nowy świat, krakowskie przedmieście and close to the castle. Not even in Rome, which obviously is objectively older and thus fuller with history. But this felt closer to... Home.

Those streets, they look very much like any other European Old Town, they're bustling with life and there's cafés and restaurants on every step.

And yet. After every few steps. There's a sign. Again. And again. And again. The Nazis killed people here. They lined them up and shot them here. And here. And here. And here too. And here.

[Image ID: Memorial Tablet commemorating Germans shooting 30 Poles, some of them randomly, on the street. There are flowers and znicze underneath. End ID]

[Image ID: Two Memorial Tablets, one commemorating Russian Crimes during 19th century partitions in which they destroyed Chopin memorabilia, along with his piano, the other commemorating Gymnasium teachers (secondary education) who continued teaching during WW2 German occupation. End ID]

[Memorial Tablet and flowers in Polish white-red colours, commemorating the wounded people from the Warsaw uprising that got treated in an insurgent hospital. German occupants seized it, shot some of the wounded and poured gasoline over others and burned them alive. End ID.]

And the castle, the king's castle that we raised from ruins. That Germans destroyed entirely. Like they bombed down the entire city. To not leave us anything. Because they wanted to erase our history and subjugate our people.

[Image ID: on the left, picture of the ruined castle 1944. Only rubble is left. On the right, the rebuilt castle. It is red in colour. End ID]

And rage, and grief I didn't know I still had carried shot up in me and I understood now why our resistance were shedding blood for those streets. I could almost feel the bullets flying in the air, like a weird time-echo I faintly picked up on through the layers of the years.

I think the right all too often co-opts this anger, this grief, and twists it to suit their purposes. But this is not a good reason to bury it, either. Buried anger like this breeds resentment. So for the first time, I let myself feel it and I wanted to do things to the Nazis and everyone who collaborated with them that I will not write down here.

But we shouldn't stop here. Instead, we could channel it to something productive. The same thing is happening to our Ukrainian neighbours, right now. How much their hearts must bleed when they see the streets of Kijv destroyed. Or any other Ukrainian city dear to them. It's their work, their efforts, their culture, their history. Their home.

So support Ukraine right now. Support Ukrainian refugees. Support All refugees that are escaping bombardements of their homes. Combat the ideology that leads to this destruction. In your own town, in our country. Support Polish Jewish people, Polish Trans people, Polish Lgbtqia+ people, Polish Disabled people, Polish Muslims. Elections are coming up, vote those right wing bastards out of this beautiful city, that we rebuilt again through sheer willpower.

[Image ID: on the left, the destroyed market square from 1945. There's rubbel lying everywhere, a group of people are standing in front. On the right, the same market square, today, rebuilt. Each house is very colourful and the walls are painted & decorated. A statue of the mermaid, Warsaw's emblem, is standing in the centre. Her arm is raised, holding a sword. Her other hand holds a shield. End ID.]

[pargolettasworld]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RqzfbaLeMY

When you think of “Disaster Songs,” you probably think of songs about shipwrecks, logging or mining disasters, the stuff that Dr. Heather Sparling writes about.  Dr. Sparling focuses on the Atlantic maritime tradition of disaster songs, especially from Canada, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t disaster songs from elsewhere in the world.  Here’s one that talks about a disaster that I remember happening.  

For those of us old enough to remember, and for everyone else who watched the 2019 miniseries about it, Chernobyl is almost completely synonymous with “nuclear power plant meltdown.”  There is a bit more to Chernobyl than that of course -- there was at one point a flourishing Jewish community there, and a major Hasidic dynasty.  Not all Jews whose ancestors lived in Ukraine have ancestry in Chernobyl, but a lot do.  So when this song discusses the graves of our ancestors, now rendered inaccessible by radiation, that’s quite a lot of people involved.

Also, if you aren’t old enough to remember, or if you didn’t live in this particular region of the world . . . the line about being afraid to eat salad is pretty true.  My family happened to move to Germany for a year, and we arrived in maybe late August of 1986, about four months after the meltdown.  The radiation clouds had swept west from Ukraine (at that time, the Ukrainian SSR) right around the time that the spring rains were falling in Eastern and Central Europe.  People thought that the rain was contaminated, and it fell on the blossoms of fruit trees and on fields of vegetables that were just beginning to sprout.  This made a lot of people freak out about eating the fruits and vegetables that had been in bloom or sprouting under the potentially radioactive rain.

When we arrived at the house we’d rented for the year, we were thrilled to discover berry bushes and fruit trees in the back yard.  We couldn’t wait to eat currants and gooseberries and sour cherries, but our neighbors very sternly warned us not to eat anything that grew in that yard, because it would surely kill us.  (It didn’t; my mom ate some gooseberries before the neighbors warned her, and she just had her 76th birthday last week, so she’s fine.)  We left at the end of the year, but if my memories of those neighbors are accurate, I’m sure they didn’t eat their backyard fruit for a few more years after that.

[hasdrubal-gisco]

eurovision '24 semifinal 1 early review

content and spoiler warning for croatia, cyprus, ireland, lithuania, poland, serbia, ukraine, australia, azerbaijan, finland, iceland, luxembourg, moldova, portugal, slovenia, germany, sweden, united kingdom

croatia - it's not easy going first but this is a bad way to do it regardless. already the woke agenda has us singing about anxiety attacks. if you are prone to anxiety get off the stage and let real warriors conquer the hearts of evropa. "my presence fades to black" yeah i wish it would. qorban/10

cyprus - many have said this before but i think cypriots should launch missiles at ankara just to see what would happen. singer is very serbian looking with the ironed long hair, very 2008 romcom looking music video (complimentary), forgettable song, thus has got to be someone's niece. mid/10

ireland - thank you god for making our enemies this embarrassing. i just know she had a self harm tumblr blog in 2013. very sincerely sending this to eurovision is comparable in national humiliation to the treaties of trianon and versailles. 30 year old antisemitic pagan themlet/10

lithuania - this is nothing. lithuania/10

poland - kinda of a normal pop song, i can see myself hearing this on the radio while stuck at a red light. good to see a weird looking woman. jeszcze polska nie zginęła/10

serbia - #JUSTICE FOR BRESKVICA. zorja or zejna or breskvica would have mopped the floor with her. this will lose and it will deserve it, hopefully all the PZE jury members including sajsi will be executed in a public square. bad/10

ukraine - hate to say it but the loathsome ruthenians have once again sent a good contestant. if my last name was Shemaieva i would simply not use Heil as an artistic name. i can hardly believe i'm saying this but i think it would be better without the fat girl rapping. critical support for ruthenian autonomous oblast/10

australia - my opinion is colored by the fact that i was viewing the music video, which is a consistent two and a half minute face closeup of the white guy cumming. the song itself is not bad, but i could do without the white guy cumming, actually. australia gets a pass this year/10

azerbaijan - you can always count on the iranic people to sneak in subtle references to sun-worship. oldest trick in the book. considering this was the last song picked, this was maybe not worth the wait. don't want to doxx anyone but one of the backup dancers looks like a beloved tumblr user. eeh/10

finland - random xD WAFFLES. the "what does the fox say" candidate of the year, and of course its from the turbo-autistic finns. total opposite of tact and taste. the west has fallen to its far-easternmost asiatic enemy (the mongols (finns)). beyond repair/10

iceland - based for sending an older woman. this is pretty good, nothing much to add. will maybe listen to the icelandic version. top quartile/10

luxembourg - israeli broad with skinny arms singing in french ? *wiping the sweat from my brow*. finally something worthwhile out of europe's last grand duchy. am yisroel chai/10

moldova - pleasant surprise out of the illegitimate romanian province of moldova. dignified in an atmosphere where others have been deliberately embarrassing. not impaling anyone's heart/10

portugal - this is nothing. portugal would benefit from being brazil's european vassal state. meu curaçao :(/10

slovenia - the best of the three of this exact performer that we've seen, not that that's very high praise. eeh/10

germany - pleasant surprise in an otherwise very mid year. not the worst guderian i know. germany/10

sweden - i can feel the martin x marcus x reader spam in the tags already. usually they at least send something that's listenable under normal circumstances but not eurovision-material,but not even that this time around. as always, marg bar sweden/10

united kingdom - (watching the official music video) lol that's probably 4k/mo in london. nobody cares about the failstate of the united cringedom, they should have been excised from the contest when they left the eu. nice trainspotting references in the clip tho. bleh/10

final conclusion - overall very disappointing year, luxembourg stands in a separate category, even without the ethnonarcissism. germany, moldova, iceland, ukraine are okay but nothing to be thrilled about. the plague of appealing to jury votes at the cost of anything interesting is crushing this competition. seeing what got passed up in serbia instead of teya dora makes one wonder what the situation is like in other countries. help me, zejna. zejna, help me. i hope semi 2 will be better but there's not many heavy hitters

[safety-pin-punk]

I don't know if you've talked about it before, but how DID you get into punk? I'm kind of curious :o And are you into hardcore punk? Any good bands you know of? Oh also do you listen to bands in languages that aren't English? I'd love to hear about them!

Sorry, I know these are a lot of questions^^; You can tale your time with answering them. Have a nice day/night!^^♡

I love getting questions like this that dont require me to do much thinking lol I hope you have a good day/night as well anon!!

How did I get into punk? Great question! It was more of a transition though. Believe it or not, I was a redneck country kid through and through. I still own a few cowboy hats and listen to Johnny Cash occasionally. I can think of one moment in my life that kinda flipped that switch though. I was in my sisters car when I was around 15(?) (mind you she is 10 years older than I am) and a Bowling for Soup song came on. Specifically it was 1985, and I just fell in love with it. And despite my dad being a DJ, he played a lot of weddings when I was younger, so I didn’t listen to much alternative music. But from there, I started doing a lot of research on alternative subcultures. Believe it or not, but punk has a LOT in common with real redneck culture. Anti government, let people do what they want, take care of your community. And maybe its just SW PA rednecks that are like that, but it made for a pretty easy transition to punk. Honestly old country music and punk music has a lot in common too, its just a question of does it have a fiddle or an electric guitar lol

Am I into Hardcore Punk? Not really. I listen to some hardcore stuff, occasionally a bit of metal, but my heart and soul belongs to pop punk/alt rock/post punk type stuff

Good bands I know of? Im assuming you were talking about hardcore bands from the way the question was structured, but I dont listen to much outside of bigger names with hardcore when I do listen to it. However, I will certainly take this opportunity to promote an alt pop band whose songs are currently living rent free in my head: Arrows in Action (its not punk but still good music)

Bands in Languages That Arent English? YES I DO ACTUALLY

I cant find it right now, but towards the start of the war between Ukraine and Russia, I made a post with a bunch of Ukrainian punk bands. So that’s floating around somewhere

Theres also this Russian band I found on tiktok when I still had the app (dark days I know)

And this French band that I ADORE

[kramlabs]

Hi I’m running for President.

I’m famous and my family is famous.

We never have worked at a fast food restaurant or cleaned our own house. Not even once.

Listen I need to level with you all. This has gone on way too long.

Politely.

My campaign and my fake opponent’s campaign do not give a solitary fuck about you.

At all. At all. At all.

Listen, personally I think some of you are super, but most of the people that we work for view you as just dumb gullible marks and it sucks that we have to come out here and do a song and dance with these jackals with the microphones and cameras and Ivy League thought police and World Economic Forum sociopaths.

We are all actors on a stage and sometimes we get the nod and prance out here and perform. We are all vetted by the Men Behind the Curtain who own us, they own you, wherever you work, wherever you live, wherever you bank…they own us all.

Everybody’s got a boss.

We have to come out here and do this stupid song and dance and emote and we hire PR douchebags from Yale to tell you stories, but the real story is Fuck you.

We don’t care if the military ran a live exercise and tested out toxic drugs on you, we don’t give a rat’s ass if your grandma was suffocated in the hospital or your newborn was born dead.

We don’t care if we murder thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions or billions. In Ukraine or the Middle East or in Ohio or Florida or Texas or New York City, in America or in Kanada or Aussie or Fraahhhnnncee or China or Korea or who gives a shit.

We just don’t.

We need you to worship us and make excuses for us and you will because you are useless eater gullible hapless dolts at our mercy and we are elites.

Some of us think there are too many of you and are aligned with our real bosses and some of us just stick our heads in the sands and go along because whatever. What do you care? Said Rockefeller to Aaron Russo.

We have minders and bankers who have arranged everything in advance, and we don’t give a fuck if our minders set trains on fire or push jabs into your precious little useless eater kids, or make up rules where Grandpa gets to die with a warm glove of water on his hand, again, we just don’t give a fuck. At all. At all. At all.

We are not going to investigate anybody, nobody is going to jail, we are going to parties and our Yalies and our Harvards and Stanfords and our MITs and our Gleaming Talking Heads are going to look at you with fake sympathy and “feel your pain” like that Stanley Tucci character in Hunger Games and then we are just going to keep murdering y’all because again…we just don’t give a fuck.

Maybe some of our True Believer minions do give a fuck, but they will sell your ass out in a heartbeat if we just give them the charismatic song and dance at a private dinner and make them feel pretty and look in their eyes and say, “we did the best we could”.

Dumbasses.

We will be unveiling new injections soon and we’ve already paid off or threatened your fake resistance to spin this as a positive and they do so as instructed. We will be dropping the hammer soon with a new fake pathogen and a banking collapse and probably a cyber attack and some new cancer causing vectors because we have to get rid of most of you.

We have satellite phones and bunkers and stuff. Most of our Middle Managers will get a rude shock that they don’t get the golden ticket into the bunkers. Maybe you all can tear them to shreds for us as we watch on the monitors and fine dine and clink glasses.

We will also probably need to escalate world war with Russia and then China, but we’ve got the elites of those nations on board as well. The fun part is all the saber rattling and watching all those jackals with the cameras salivate for war.

In the meantime, we have prepared some Tucker Carlson and Russell Brand and Kim Iversen and some good old Pfizer Bad rah rah, and for those of you truly stupid dolts hanging on for dear life, the old legacy media favorites.

There may be some race riots and food shortages and we may try to swing a trans-riot for shits and giggles and we are definitely monitoring you everywhere, so don’t think that you can run some kind of resistance.

I feel like it’s important to say honest things because Truth is like a lion.

Now go out there and vote harder!

Just kidding, we’ll give you whoever we feel like and if you don’t like it, that’s too bad.

[mightyflamethrower]

News

Newt Gingrich is convinced Biden wants Harris to lose, and he thinks he knows why…......

2024 is shaping up to be one of the most bizarre elections we’ve ever seen. From Biden being ousted in a “soft coup” by his own party, to President Trump teaming up with RFK Jr. and Elon Musk, and Kamala Harris basically hijacking her precious “democracy” to try to steal the White House—it’s been a wild ride. But one of the most interesting aspects of this campaign has been Joe Biden’s reaction to it all. It’s starting to look like Biden is actively sabotaging Kamala Harris. I mean, he actually put on a MAGA hat the day after Kamala’s debate with President Trump. Then he stood in front of the White House press corps and said he and Harris were “singing from the same song sheet” at a time when Team Harris was desperately trying to distance themselves from Biden’s—and Kamala’s—failures.

And if that wasn’t enough, while Kamala was trying to score political points by attacking Governor DeSantis during Hurricane Milton, Biden was praising the Florida Governor. So what’s really going on? Well, Newt Gingrich thinks he knows. He believes Joe and Jill have teamed up to undercut Harris—and he thinks he knows exactly why.

2WAY:

“We’re in the early stages of watching her collapse,” says @newtgingrich of Kamala Harris. “It’s just my hunch …. that sometime in the last two weeks, Joe and Jill looked at each other and thought, you know, wouldn’t it be a great legacy if Joe’s the only guy ever to beat Trump? And I think the stuff he’s done to undermine her in the last ten days is pretty amazing.”

Hey Newt, we agree and also believe Joe is out to sabotage Ms. Harris, too. As a matter of fact, we’ve been covering this story from all angles.

Revolver:

But it goes way beyond just a dislike of Kamala Harris. So, we went on the hunt for a theory about the hat that goes a bit deeper, and we happened upon a good one that really seems to have a ring of truth to it. It’s about mass revenge for the old guy. Let’s face it, Joe might be a mental midget suffering from senility, but he still has enough political savvy to know exactly what he’s doing for the 2024 election. This wasn’t a mistake. As Julie Kelly so artfully put it, Joe’s on a mission to prove that all the coup operators who tossed him aside like yesterday’s trash were dead wrong. That’s Joe’s top priority right now, and that Trump 2024 hat symbolized it perfectly.

That theory lines up pretty well with Newt’s. After all, despite Biden’s senility, he’s still a career politician, and his pettiness practically runs on autopilot at this point.

And, in what might be the most fitting label ever pinned on a politician, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich called Kamala Harris the “first doofus nominated for president”—though, to be fair, she wasn’t actually “nominated,” was she? Not technically, anyway.

Here’s the exchange between Newt and Sean Hannity:

SEAN HANNITY: What’s your analysis? NEWT GINGRICH: Well, look, she has three really big problems. First, she’s just not very competent. I mean, you’re watching somebody who ought to be, like, in a high school play, and she’s on the national TV as a candidate. She just can’t move at the speed and with the knowledge you expect. Second, we’re in a world that’s dangerous. It’s dangerous with hurricanes. It’s dangerous with the war in the Middle East. It’s dangerous in Ukraine. It’s dangerous with Venezuelan criminal gangs coming to the U.S. And that kind of a dangerous environment, people want someone strong. I thought DeSantis, for example, if you compare his press conference with her normal experience, DeSantis looks like he’s competent. He looks like he knows what he’s doing. And so her very being hurts her. And then third, she has this huge crisis. Everything her base believes in, the country hates. And so she has to be for men, for example, competing with women. The country’s totally opposed to that. She can’t be for school choice. The teachers’ unions won’t let her. And you go to a whole series of issues. So she does this dance because if she’s really clear, one of two things will happen. The country will wipe her out or her base will rebel. And so she can never be honest about who she is. Those three things are all coming together in what I think is maybe the most disastrous TV series ever done by a presidential candidate. SEAN HANNITY: If Donald Trump would just say in every appearance that maybe some of you don’t like me, but I will secure the border, I will fix the economy, and I will make the world safer, I think that would resonate. Am I wrong? NEWT GINGRICH: No, you’re right, but he didn’t have to say the first part. I mean, just relax. The country is going to make a decision. You know, they’re not asking him to go out on a date. They’re asking him to be commander-in-chief. They’re asking him to be president. They’re asking him to solve problems. The fact that he might not be the guy… Now, personally, I think it would be fun to have him over for an evening, but he might not be the guy that some people want to have over for the evening. But they sure as heck will prefer him keeping them safe to her being just a total… She’s a doofus. I mean, this is the first doofus nominated for president, at least in my lifetime, and that’s the best way to understand it.

Well said, Newt. You haven’t lost your touch or your observational skills, that’s for darn sure.

All joking aside, what Newt said about Biden’s revenge plot and Kamala’s ineptitude is spot-on. We’re seeing the signs of Biden’s vengefulness at every turn. Sure, he might have a raging case of dementia, but that doesn’t change who he is at his core—and you can bet Jill, his number one nursemaid, is right there guiding him on what to say and do. It’s no secret she’s the commanding force in the marriage, and likely in his political career, too. And as for Kamala, it’s clear she’s out of her league. So far out, she’d need Google Maps and a search-and-rescue team to find her way back. Watching Harris and Tampon Tim is like being at an awkward high school play, where you’re just praying for the show to end so you can stop cringing and go home. Speaking of Harris cringe, we’ll leave you with this little gem.

[misconceivedcapricorn]

Jellicle!RTC AU

I am a little crazy about Cats right now if you couldn't tell, so have an idea I've been brewing up!

Keep in mind that I'm talking about this as if it were an actual stage production. It's not, I'm just obsessed with thinking about it as if it were.

Established Legoland and RTC characters are now cats and a part of the Jellicles. Whether or not they were there for the previous Jellicle ball is not really thought out yet but I'd have to say yes in terms of the AU.

In this next iteration of the Jellicle ball, although all the cats do want to be the Jellicle Choice, they're not exactly competing (well, except for like Ocean and probably Jane Doe but that will come later <3)

I think Noel's Lament would be more of a performance-type thing in the new context, like 'The Awefull Battle of The Pekes and the Pollicles' or 'Growltiger's Last Stand'. Sort of in-universe entertainment for other cats and/or Old Deuteronomy.

Ocean is still a little bitch in the beginning, and 'What The World Needs' wouldn't have to change much. Basically, it's just Ocean going "Hey!! I should be the Jellicle Choice!! Everyone else is a loser who doesn't deserve it!", which is basically the same as the original context. Evidently, this doesn't fly with the other cats, she tries to recover, but ultimately fails.

Mischa is still definitely a cat from Ukraine, but obv his backstory has to be altered in order for it to fit in the new context (more on that later). He would definitely bust in and do 'This Song Is Awesome' as it would probably fit in the same vein as Tugger bursting in for the funsies- abrupt interruptions that other cats may join in on for fun. 'Talia' would definitely be a sweeter song, maybe following 'La La Love' and 'Small Things Become Big Things' with Astrid, Hank and Trishna (who are all together here btw because I'm sick of love triangles)

'Space Age Bachelor Man' would be a sort of in-universe entertainment thing too, but I think it would be fun to have it be with the assistance of other cats (Like maybe the psychic twins Tantomile and Coricopat would help him sing it in a sense? Like they sing it for him. TBH I don't like the idea that much cause I love when Ricky sings but it also doesn't make sense for a mute cat to sing) and have some other cats like Ocean realise that he is perfectly capable of performing and be charismatic I guess? basically other cats acknowledging Ricky is a pretty cool guy.

Constance I think would have the same sort of arc where she begins realising she's self-sabotaging and she's in a toxic friendship. Confrontation happens in a similar beat to the original, minus the death bit where instead maybe Macavity did something again and Ocean can only think about how it affected her and not Constance. She performs her monologue and then 'Sugar Cloud', and it having the same effect as in RTC where Ocean apologises, the others join in and hype her up, etc.

Jane Doe is that Creepy Cat who was reanimated by Macavity. She sort of has the Grizabella-type role but the cats are kind of justifiably terrified because a zombie cat isn't exactly the easiest thing to welcome to your club, especially since she's kind of dead and probably is incredibly confusing to the senses. She sings 'The Balld Of Jane Doe' and then the cats perform 'The New Birthday Song' for her and welcome her into the club. She is eventually chosen by Old Deuteronomy for the Jellicle Choice once the celebrations are over.

Astrid, Hank and Trishna are sort of a package deal in this AU. They sing 'Small Things Become Big Things' and 'La La Love' together because I'm not gonna ditch any of their songs even in an AU. Basically, they're all cute and I would imagine they would be already established, although Trishna is still coming out of her shell.

Corey's Rap is...um. Something, certainly. I don't know if I would keep it in because *gestures at it* but um maybe he could have a repurposed rap around the same idea of him being a player or whatever and rapping into a funhouse mirror + the recorder thing with Constance cause that's cute.

Okay! Now for backstories:

Ocean is a cat that belonged to some kind of Hippie family as per the original, but obviously they can't really provide her exactly what she needs so she often slinks around the parliament or whatever and basically picks up how the politicians act, which probably contributed to her personality lmao. I would tentatively suggest maybe a 'Play To Win' number, but evidently heavily edited and changed because I like the song but I hate the ableism.

Constance belongs to a family of bakers, and they're obviously not very high class but they can still afford to feed Constance and her brother fish and other cat foods so they're not incredibly poor. She build resentment but its rather because she feels like she can't be seen even at home with her humans or at the junkyard with other cats other than her being a 'nice cat'.

Noel is a house cat, quite obviously, and belongs to a middle-class woman whose husband has left her. She takes care of Noel when she can, but is obviously having difficulties in life and has a hard time trying to get Noel to act like a normal cat. I imagine the homophobia would be more from the humans than the cats (e.g. humans questioning why the cat doesn't show any interest in female cats maybe?) because I don't really think cats, especially Jellicle Cats, care about if you're gay or not.

Mischa probably snuck onto a boat per his owner's insistence (maybe due to going-ons at the time, idk). Maybe he was presented to a rich couple who were expecting a docile cat, and then were annoyed to receive a cat nothing like they had requested, so they locked him certain rooms or let him outside more often than they should. He also had a mate(?) Talia, but its 50-50 on whether or not the cats believe she's real until the song.

Ricky is a cat with some kind of degenerative disease, much like the OG Ricky, and is at least, attempted to be sheltered by his humans, but he always manages to slip out somehow. He cant talk, sing, etc. He might be able to move, but not for very long. He is a very creative cat and deeply wants to prove he's cool (which he is) to the other cats because he feels overlooked. Cue SABM.

Jane is Penny, obviously, but reanimated by Macavity for chaos.. Basically, at some point, Penny died, lost her head somehow, whatever. She was a part of the Jellicles briefly before her death, but because she was reanimated, no longer looks like herself, acts like herself, remembers herself, etc, nobody can figure out who she is. In terms of Penny and Ezra, they also used to belong to drug dealers (but also maybe hippies) most likely having Penny accidentally lead the police to them and arrest them. they later join the Jellicles where they meet Tammy. Ezra and Tammy are still Jellicles.

Astrid would most likely have a similar origin story to Mischa, given that he was derived from her originally. In any case, she was also a cat brought to London. I am inclined to say that Astrid is still somehow cousins with Ocean, because I think that's important to her even if I'm not sure exactly what their dynamic was. She definitely is a street cat here, which probably isn't uncommon in the context of Cats. She was uncomfortable with the Jellicles at first but slowly warmed up through, yk, Trishna and Hank.

Trishna is a shyer cat, as per her usual characterisation, but is an expert in insects, bugs, etc and is more than happy to share what she knows. I don't know if Trishna has a specific backstory in canon, so I'd leave her backstory for the AU more like she was just a part of the Jellicles since her life kind of began so she finds safety in there. I would say she definitely is a house cat or sorts, but maybe to some kind of entomologist.

Hank is a sweeter and friendlier cat. He would probably be a romantic, I imagine, with the fact he's been a focal point of romance for both the 2008 and 2009 versions of the show (as in he sings a song with Astrid or Trishna). He wouldn't dance for obvious reasons but he's definitely a singer. He would probably have been the one to first welcome Astrid into the Jellicles, and get Trishna to come out of her shell a bit more.

Tammy and Ezra would have like brief segments in there too. Tammy would probably do the praising of the Everlasting Cat or whatever, and Ezra would most likely hold some kind of puppet show or funny dance number because I don't think he would sing unless for backing/chorus.

Karnak and Virgil exist too, but I imagine that Karnak is either sort of there as an easter egg (like in set design) and Virgil appearing also as an easter egg (like a cat dressing up as a rat that resembles Virgil or something)

[imjustli]

My ranking of the eurovision songs as of now, with comments

1. Slovenia - love Slovienia for sending boy band bangers two years in a row. This is probably the first esc song that genuinely has favourite song potential even outside the context of esc

2. Romania - I'd actually listen to this outside of esc too. His staging is so bad though. I honestly think it could take the n1 spot if it was better

3. Azerbaijan - I just fucking love this song

4. Latvia - Again, very similar to my actual music taste

5. Czechia - I can't explain the chokehold this song has on me

6. Netherlands - just really good 10/10

7. Moldova - I love a modern song with traditional elements. Or the other way around

8. Spain - idk it grew on me I love it now

9. Iceland - I think it would benefit from better staging, but aside from that I really enjoy it

10. Ukraine - my 15 year old self would have eaten this up. The little The Score stan left in me still does

11. Portugal - 10/10 vibes I sure like this

12. Denmark - don't get me wrong, I'd love to dislike this. Sadly I really like it

13. Ireland - this sounds like something my mom would listen to, but the kind I still enjoy

14. Australia - this also sounds like something my mom would listen to. I think they should've competed last year though, that song was better

15. Switzerland - I enjoy a good ballad

16. UK - good breakup song. I like it. It's kinda generic, so I doubt it's gonna get a lot of votes though

17. Estonia - again, I enjoy I good ballad

18. Norway - it's a great song, still feels overrated tho

19. Armenia - it's good, but it's the sort of song that is very double or nothing when performed live

20. Malta - this sounds like something I should love, but it's just a little wrong. Maybe it'll grow on me

21. France - so, it grew on me. Maybe it'll grow on me more

22. Belgium - catchy, but that's about it

23. Albania - I think it'll grow on me, but it's not there yet

24. Georgia - didn't stand out to me

25. San Marino - it's good but it didn't stand out to me

26. Serbia - I have a love-hate relationship with this song. The hate-part is leading 53-47%. This may change

27. Greece - didn't stand out

28. Cyprus - also didn't stand out to me

29. Austria - eh

30. Croatia - I'm usually not a fan of meme entries in the beginning, so I'm sure it'll grow on me

31. Israel - I just dont vibe with it, and it's kinda generic (also, why is she dressed like a raw steak in the video?)

32. Finland - Just not my type of rock. I honestly still hope it wins, even though I didn't particularly like it

33. Germany - this is also just not my type of rock. I genuinely think it's great Germany sent it though, probably the best chance they have had at winning in a while

34. Lithuania - I enjoy a good ballad. This one isn't particularly good. It's really funny that they sent a Monika L 2 years on a row tho

35. Sweden - sure it's an ok song, and I actually quite like Loreens music (but this is honestly one of her worse). I just believe we need to start flopping. Like so bad. We should suck for a bit, we could do with the humbling. Let's have a 10 year nonqualifing streak!

36. Italy - this one is gonna be so overhyped because people have a weird fucking obsession with Italy. It's alright, I guess

37. Poland - girlie can't fucking sing. The studio version is pretty good though, she needed the autotune

[newcatwords]

where i'm from (part 2)

this is a follow-up post to "where i'm from (part 1)".

when i was little and we were already a few years into living in the US, i remember asking my dad something like this: "dad, i don't get it. we're from the soviet union but that country doesn't exist anymore. so the part of soviet union that we're from is now a country called ukraine. but we don't speak ukrainian, we speak russian. and the food we eat is russian. so which one are we, ukrainian or russian?" and my dad confidently responded "neither. we're JEWISH." which broke my tiny little brain because here i had been thinking that "jewish" was a religion, not an ethnicity.

but alas, in the complicated logic of the place that i'm from, his answer made sense. you see, the former soviet union (and contemporary russia) was a large multi-ethnic empire filled with azerbaijanis, georgians, kazakhs, uzbekhs, turkmen, lithuanians, latvians, russians, ukrainians, and yes, jews. "jewish" was one of the ethnicities and it was listed on one's state ID.

yes, i was born in a place that was so racist it divided white people into a bunch of categories. here's a chart showing the "differences" between ethnicities of the soviet union. from the top left to bottom right: russian, ukrainian, tatar, jew, romani, kyrgyz, belarussian, lithuanian, georgian, armenian, kazakh, uzbek, latvian, estonian, azerbaijani, moldovan, tajik, & turkmen.

but how can i really be "from" a place that we left when i was 4 years old? aren't i much more "from" a place that i've lived for most of my life? and i've still encountered people who say "no, tell them where you're *really* from" and i have to roll my eyes and say "ukraine" and everyone goes "ohhhh".

before the war in ukraine, many americans were pretty unfamiliar with ukraine, and if i said i was FROM ukraine, they'd say "oh so you're ukrainian" and then i'd have to start a whole long story... so i often just said that my family was russian (it would make it easier when people heard me speaking russian to my mom on the phone).

the war in ukraine has complicated the situation because now ukrainians are epic victims, but also "heroes." there's no faster way to bring down the mood of a party than to talk about ukraine, so if it does come up, i try to keep the topic matter moving. it's just all sad stories.

here's another story from childhood: my mom sometimes sang to me at bedtime and she'd sing songs in russian. about 99% of them were super sad and i remember asking her "mama, why are all the songs you sing so sad?" and she said "well, life is hard." and that was that. let's just say that the pit in my stomach from hearing that has maybe never gone away.

in many ways, "well, life is hard" is the story of being where i'm from. things were awful during tsarist times. then they were awful during the revolution & civil war. then there was stalinist repression (family members sent to the gulag) and famine. then WWII! kharkiv was occupied by nazis *multiple* times. there are whole sections of my family who just disappeared when odessa was occupied, and still, no one knows what happened to them.

things stabilized a bit after WWII, but life was always still hard. and when we came to the US? well, it wasn't easy. in the 30 years since we came to america, my family has been able to accomplish the american dream, in many ways. my parents have a nice house in the chicago suburbs. 2 cars. kids went to college & are all now living their own lives, with their own families. my niece and nephews get to have grandparents and aunts and uncles, something i never had. and now we can write a new story about where we're from. not omitting the fact that life is hard, but maybe providing a little bit more support to go along with that reality: "life is hard, but we're here with you. we'll get through this together."

[toviitaffee]

So I did get bored. And recorded myself playing guitar and singing in Polish. Don’t mind me just casually ruining my vocal chords because this song is too low for me. Also, Guitar mess ups!  I’m probably gonna regret ever posting this. OH WELL

[pargolettasworld]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwOu_rVbCKg

Last week, I enjoyed one of the most EPIC Chanukah presents I have ever received, a ticket to see “Fiddler on the Roof” in Yiddish.  Friends, it is an astonishing show.  See it if you can -- it’s playing in New York at New World Stages until January 1, 2023.

It’s amazing what a language change can do for a show.  Nothing else is really all that different from a common-or-garden “Fiddler” production.  Even the English supertitles are the original script and lyrics of the show.  But the language change.  It makes all the difference, and I still haven’t quite gotten my head completely around why it’s such a profound experience.  I’ll try to explain, but this may end up getting a bit longer than the average “hey, listen to this cool piece of Jewish music” post.  So . . .

“Fiddler on the Roof” is one of the most popular Broadway musicals of all time.  It’s been around for about sixty years, and no one’s gotten tired of it.  High schools stage it.  People literally all around the world love the story of Tevye and his daughters and their friends in Anatevka.  (I’m told it’s especially popular in Japan.)  And pretty much the reason that people give for this is:  “The story is so universal!  Everyone knows about generation gaps!  Everyone can relate to Tevye having this kind of generational conflicts with his daughters and learning about love!”

To a certain extent, this is true.  Sholom Aleichem’s stories about Tevye the dairyman and the fates of his five daughters* were translated from Yiddish into English and then carefully massaged into a show made by Jews, about Jews, but for di goyim.  That bit is important.  “Fiddler” tastes recognizably Jewish, but it’s all translated.  The score has dollops of klezmer, but it’s still pretty Westernized, and it’s often sung with a Western Broadway bel canto vocal style.  Tevye spends a lot of time in the first act explaining things to the audience, and the entire point of the song “Tradition” is to introduce a largely goyish audience to the world of Jews living in a Ukrainian shtetl in 1905.

The characters in this show are, in essence, my family.  My zayde was born in a shtetl in Ukraine, around 1910.  He’s roughly the generation of Tzeitl and Motl’s baby, which would make the younger characters about the age of my great-grandparents.  This (adjusting for generations) is also true of just about everybody who created “Fiddler,” right up to most of the current cast in the Yiddish version, many of whom are Jewish.  It’s all prettied up and sanitized for Broadway, but “Fiddler” is a show about Jews that is made by Jews, who are descended from people very much like the characters in the show.

I think it’s the translation that makes people think that the story is “universal.”  The show was originally in English . . . already a translation from the culture that it depicts.  As it traveled around the world, you had old-fashioned people in (mostly) funny, old-fashioned costumes, talking about this odd culture that not many people knew that much about, and talking about it in [insert your language here].  Of course it was “universal.”  There’s a layer of particularity that it’s really hard to get past in translation.

Oddly enough, it took one more translation to get the show beyond that barrier, and that was translating it back into Yiddish, the language of the original stories, and the language that the characters in the show are  speaking through the Translation Convention.  The Yiddish script is expertly done.  If you know a little Yiddish (as I do, and as more of the audience for this show than you’d expect does), you’ll catch a whole world of nuances about how the characters relate to each other, to the Divine, to the Torah, and to their Christian neighbors.  Where the original script uses “the Holy Book” a lot, the Yiddish script uses “di Toyre.”  The original script has to work with the fact that English uses a generic for “person,” but Yiddish uses “a Yid” as much as “a mensch.”  This, for instance, adds a whole new layer to one of Tevye’s conversations with the gradavoy, the policeman who is Tevye’s friend . . . but only sort of, because Tevye is a Yid and the gradavoy is not.

The show now sounds Jewish in a way that it kind of didn’t when it was in English.  It’s less “universal” now.  It’s specific.  It’s Jewish.  The story isn’t just about love and a generation gap -- it’s about a minority culture under a specific kind of threat, and you can hear that.  You can hear it in the emotional pitch of the dialogue.  You can hear it in Fyedka’s halting attempts at speaking Yiddish to Khave.  You can hear it when the Russian characters actually speak Russian.  The language now matches the musical vocabulary a bit better, too.  The klezmer and hazzanut flavoring comes out a bit stronger in Jewish.**

And there’s something else, too.  None of the actors are native Yiddish speakers.  They’re all smart cookies, and they’ve been carefully trained to act in Yiddish.  But if you’ve ever listened to native Yiddish speakers, you can tell that none of them are native Yiddish speakers.  Like my family, theirs changed languages upon leaving Anatevka and going to the various places the characters discuss in the final scene of the show.  On that stage, in the carefully enunciated Yiddish of the Anglophone actors, you can hear the postlude to the show. 

It’s sad to see the characters having to leave Anatevka and split up and go to New York, or Chicago, or Warsaw, or Krakow, or (as it was then) Palestine.  But in this consciously Jewish staging of it, you find yourself thinking thirty, thirty-five years into the future.  Though they don’t know it, they’re getting out of Ukraine while the getting is good.  You find yourself paying attention -- where is this character going?  Will that be a good choice?  Will this choice help the character to survive what’s coming for them all?

In the theater -- that living, breathing art form that is real people doing real things in a room filled with other real people -- you see the results of those choices.  The characters on stage are embodied by their descendants.  Anatevka is no more.  That culture was murdered.  The descendants grew up in a different language.  But tonight . . . ah, tonight, at the theater, Tevye and Golde, Tzeitl and Motl and Hodl and Perchik, and Bubbe and Zayde and Feter and Tante and Kuzyne, and the whole mishpoche, they’re all there.  On stage.  In the room, speaking not just from 2022, but from 1964, and from 1905 as well. 

This “Fiddler on the Roof” isn’t universal.  It’s Jewish, and it’s family in a really personal way.  I didn’t expect that one change to have such a big effect on me.  I really didn’t.  But it’s huge.  It felt like the old warhorse of a show changed from a presentation into an invitation.

If you’ve read this far, I thank you.  I’ve written all of this, and I still don’t think I’ve quite managed to express what it was like to sit and hear “Fiddler” in Yiddish.  But I’ve at least given a bit of what it was.  It was intensely personal, in a way that I had been told it might be, but I didn’t really know what it meant until I was there.

It’s a wonderful show.  Go see it.  Even if you think you’re overly familiar with “Fiddler on the Roof,” go see it.  You’ll be surprised.  And if you aren��t . . . well, it’s still a really good performance of “Fiddler!”

*Which aren’t quite as charming as they are in the musical.  Tzeitl and Hodl get endings that are . . . ambiguous at best, Khave’s story is completely open, and there is a reason that the show doesn’t even touch what happens to Shprintze and Beylke. **”Yiddish” literally means “Jewish” in Yiddish.  In a taped interview with my zayde made when I was a baby, he tells my parents about how, back in the Old Country, he and all the other Jews in the shtetl spoke “Jewish.”

[zsocca55]

Hello There fellow Hungarian from Poland!

Do you have aby headcanons about Poland or Polish and Hungarian Relations?

Yay, another Pole! :D Much, much love from Hungary to you guys! ❤️❤️❤️ I tried to summarize my thoughts in short sentences but….eh… sorry for the length of this, but there is like, a ton of history to work with, and one idea popped up after another and then I just got lost typing this. I might as well write a whole book about it. XD

These are listed in more or less historical order. Am I doing this right? I’m bad at making headcanons! Also my interpretation of Poland is very different from his Hetalia presentation and my notes are based heavily on how Poland and Polish people are perceived in Hungary. Sorry if that bothers anyone, but I like to stay accurate to History.

Anyway, I hope this list satisfies!

Poland:

-Used to be really childish and carefree but after the partitions he matured rather quickly

-He is quite the attention-seeker, very social and has many friends but only a few real ones and he has trust issues and fear of abandonment - that’s why he can get very clingy

-Has pride like the size of the moon

-Communicates his emotions poorly - which results in him sometimes mistreating people he likes (Lithuania and Ukraine for example) - he is getting better at reading people though

-He is a “lets get shit done” type of person - you give him a job and he will do it impeccably and in time

-He appears like this happy-go-lucky guy, but it’s actually a coping mechanism

-When he feels down, he becomes emotional - and drinks a lot - he is an emotional drunk

-Had a big fat crush on Ukraine (he even has a folk song dedicated to her, Hej Sokoły!)

-Complains a lot - like a really lot

-Poland keeps old gifts he received from his great kings and queens in a safe (nobody knows about it though)

-The partitions caused him to lose consciousness for weeks. It was the shock of losing his identity as a ‘state’. All countries involved believed that he would die.

-Poland lived with Russia between 1795-1918 due to Russia possessing most of his territory. But he often made official visits to Austria and Prussia to negotiate the treatment of his people with them. He also got away on his own a few times (to help out Hungary in 1848-49 for example).

-Poland accompanied Tadeusz Kościuszko to America, but couldn’t stay for long. Youthful America’s enthusiasm inspired him a lot.

-He is a very bad driver, and had so many accidents he doesn’t keep count, but he is a skilled pilot so he often complains about not being allowed to fly around instead of driving around.

Poland and Hungary:

-Poland was also victim of Hungarian tribal attacks before the 10th century so his boss decided to befriend the new southern neighbour in hopes of making an ally. At first Hungary thought Poland was a girl while he thought she was a boy.

-Hungary first met a Polish tribe called “Lendzianie” and so she named his people “lengyel”. Poland never corrected her though.

-They paid visits to each other often during the early decades of the 10th century and played a lot. Once they jumped in a lake for fun’s sake, without clothes, and Poland quickly realized that Hungary is in fact a girl but he hadn’t got the heart to break the news to her because she was so confident in being a boy.

-They got distanced whenever internal crisises rose in their countries. Even up to this day, if one of them has an internal struggle, the other doesn’t pry and keeps a respectful distance. They respect each others boundaries in every way.

-Poland and Hungary were married twice, but all they ever did was giggle about it like the young teens they were and caused a lot of trouble for their kings with their pranks and mischiefs.

-Poland never understood why Hungary’s attention turned towards Austria in the 1400s though. Hungary also never understood why his attention turned towards Lithuania either.

-Poland and Hungary have a very similar residing scar running in three directions across their bodies which are testimony to them being thorn in three. Poland during the partitions and Hungary during the Ottoman-Habsburg invasions when she was also basically three entities in one.

-Poland fought with Hungary against Austria in 1848-49 but was dragged back by Russia when Hungary lost. He learned of her marriage to Austria through a newspaper much later and was severely disappointed in her.

-Poland tried to negotiate with the Allies in order to save Hungary from being chopped up and lose their shared border, but France faced him with a decision: either shut up and get a place on the map or refuse the treaty and have less territory. Poland never ratified the treaty but he still resents not fighting it more.

-Hungary tried to help Poland during his war with the soviets in 1920-22 but because Czechoslovakia refused to grant access to him out of spite, she turned to Romania of all people, pleading him to help. Romania actually helped.

-Hungary was pretty shaken and isolated from everyone after WW1. Only Poland and North Italy reached out to her, searching ways to keep in contact.

-Hungary resents joining the wrong side in WW2, which made her and Poland enemies. She tried to make the best of the situation and help Poland when her troops were stationed on his territory. They met accidentally in a forest while Poland was marching with partisans towards Warsaw in 1944. She helped him out but Prussia found them and Hungary pretended to take Poland hostage in order to release him later during the night. Her men were killed for fraternizing with the enemy.

-During the German occupation in Poland it was forbidden to listen to Polish nationalist songs and so Hungary and her men played “God save Poland” on repeat just because they could and Poland and his people were very thankful for it.

-When the Iron Curtain was drawn, Hungary hid away in her land, depressed, but Poland kept fighting the new rule until the Poznan protests inspired the uprising in Budapest in 1956. Originally Hungary organized a solidarity march for him but it turned into a freedom fight. She was struck down by Russia though, leaving her bleeding out on her streets with a hole in her chest. Poland flew to Budapest and offered his own blood to save her. Hungary remained unconsious for a week until she woke up. He was at her bedside the whole time.

-Poland often jokes about Hungary probably inheriting his “immortality” because of the blood transfusion.

-Hungary hid away again after 56. He tried to help Hungary get over her trauma by visiting her often during the rest of their years in the Soviet Union, but something broke in her and he didn’t really know what to do.

-This put a certain distance between them.

-After the USSR fell, Poland was quick to make new friends and make up with his neighbours but Hungary came out of her shell much slower. She did admire him for his strength to move on. He also encouraged her a lot to get up and improve her country.

-Hungary considers him her only real friend. She doesn’t trust anybody else with her life anymore. Out of gratitude, she decided to declare a special day for Poland (March 23) and when he heard of it, he actually teared up.

-Nowadays they visit each other on their Independence Days and celebrate together. They also go and cheer for each other’s football teams with hundreds of Poles chanting “Ria, ria, Hungaria!” and hundreds of Hungarians chanting “Polska! Polska!” on the streets.

-After hearing the song “Varsó hiába várod” from the band Republic, Poland thought Warsaw is indeed too far from Budapest so he made a plan to build a railroad so they can come and go between each other’s capitals in five hours. The idea is under construction at the moment.

-Poland and Hungary like to think that they are the heart of V4.

-Hungary goes along with whatever mischief or prank Poland makes up. And vica versa.

-They also promote their friendship with so much enthusiasm that Romania often calls them out for being too mushy.

.

Uh, thanks for reading through this! I know this is a lots of text, I get carried away when making up ideas. I’m unable to summarize my thoughts in short sentences. I don’t have the ability.

Also 50% of this is not even headcanon, some of these really happened or are happening.

Anyway, I hope I answered your question! :’)

[mr-fangs]

I think they have addressed it about as far as they will honestly. They probably regret that particular show at this point but stick pretty hard to the apolitical anti-war stance even when there is a clear morally right side (for better or for worse, I’ve honestly seen good arguments both ways). For what it is worth they have directly condemned the current Ukrainian invasion a few times - Pär said this regarding his old comment from the crimea concert:

“My quote was how I experienced the situation there and then on site and the impressions I took home with me. That someone invades or occupies another country is against international law, which I think should apply instead of someone resorting to armed conflict as has now happened in Ukraine. Our catalog of songs is proof that there has been enough fighting.”

I understand that Sabaton don't want to do Roger Waters but they should fucking address the fact that they played a concert in occupied Crimea for pro-putin biker club. I'm Sabaton fan but i feel conflicted now, I'd hate to stop supporting them.